Quit Calling Us Negative
I’ll keep this short and sweet.
Why do Mary Kay consultants show up here to tell us, very impolitely and usually rudely, how negative we are?
It always amazes me how nasty some of their chastizing comments can be, yet they come here to call us negative?
I think a lot of the anger, the need to call us negative, comes from fear. Fear that if you actually stopped and stepped back from the rah-rah of the Mary Kay cult-like experience that you might see the same things. And that’s scary because then you’d have to deal with lots of things. All the same things that so many of the women here had to deal with.
Critical examination of an issue is NOT negativity. It’s just plain smart.
Lipstick on 
Ann on 
Brooke on 
Tam on 
They can call us negative all day long, the truth is they know down deep that we are positively
right, that there is very little money to be made in MK and a positively outrageous chance that they will incur debt.
The truth is neither negative or positive it is simply the TRUTH!
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Thank you LJ! I’d just about had enough of being called negative! I’m soo very glad that you have addressed this! You ROCK! Woo hoo!
Soon the ones that call us negative will learn that this is just another way that MK tries to keep their consultants in line! If you (MK consultants) hear something you don’t like or that isn’t in line with MK scripts then is MUST be negative and therefore avoided! Sounds awfully cult like to me! ~Shuddering~ UGH…..so glad I made it out of the pink fog!
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Way to go LJ! It’s about time somebody said something about this problem. When I was in MK, I was very bothered by the fact that nothing negative was allowed to be said in the sales meetings or to other IBCs. In our group, when someone said, “How was your week?” we had two options of how to respond: If the week was pretty good and/or if we sold a lot, we were supposed to say, “Fantastic!!!!” If the week was terrible, usually involving personal trials or lack of sales, we were supposed to say, “Unbelievable!”
I should have realized that the “anti-negativity” rhetoric was code for “anti-reality”.
In the meetings, I was never allowed to ask questions that could even remotely be considered negative. For weeks on end, our meetings revolved around recruiting. I once asked when were we going to start learning about skincare and makeup application so we could be more helpful to our clients and, in turn, to our own images. Recruiting, I reasoned, seemed like we were creating competition for ourselves when we should be focusing on being the best “makeup artists” we could be.
I’ll leave to your imagination how well THAT went over.
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I was percieved as being “negative” when I had just given birth and instead of coming to the recruiting meetings right away I stayed home with my child for two months. When I came back I was questioned about my lack of commitment and accused of being a “smother mother.” I have never been so offended. I thought Mary Kay was supposed to be this wonderful flexible job that would allow me to stay home with my child more. Instead I was insulted and scolded for using that so called flexibility. They are the NEGATIVE people.
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Ditto to all of the above! Everytime I mentioned reality, it was translated into being negative and even though I was not scolded, I was reminded to think positively! There is such a thing as reality and this site educates past, present, and possible future consultants (aka recruits) to the realities of the “opportunity” of MK and the MLM and cult that it is. Thanks for posting this. I am getting rather tired of being told that we’re negative for simply stating the truth about our experiences and the truth about MK and its cult-like principals. The problem is, they don’t like the truth because they are so wrapped up in the pink fog that they cannot see. This is a sure sign of them being taken up in a cult-like situation. Whether they will ever see through the fog, remains to be seen. By the way, if they don’t like this site, they dont’ have to come here or come back. They can stay in their pitiful state of pink denial!
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It’s just like showing up to an AA meeting and calling them a bunch of quitters. We are here for support and to support each other because we have had similar experiences. You KNOW in the MK meetings they are talking about how sad they feel for all the women who don’t take the MK opportunity – they’re talking negative about everyone who isn’t in the pink club. It’s perspective. We are here because we want to be – they are here because they feel the need to defend themselves; they actually think we’re attacking them by supporting eachother here. Sad.
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Exactly!! This site simply states facts and our hard-learned experiences. Doing so is not “being negative”, and if it makes anyone think twice about MK, good! MK consultants who stop here only to be rude and call names are truly negative. In MK, my Sales Director frowned on any negative talk at all. She literally stopped a ‘red jacket’ sister consultant mid-sentence in a meeting because she started to mention all the sacrifice of time away from her daughter it was taking to do DIQ. She instantly said, “But it’s easy, right?!?!” with a fake smile and her David Cooper-inspired head nod.
To be told not to listen to or even consider opinions outside of what someone wants you to think is characteristic of abusive relationships. It’s called mind control. They’ve convinced you to shut out even your own questioning of MK lest you be labeled a “negative Nellie”. Totally cult-like!
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PS, what’s wrong with the forum button? I’ve tried clicking it from here and from the homepage only to get a blank white screen. What’s going on?
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Me too RTP- no forum!!!
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Thank God, I thought it was just me again! LOL
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Thanks LJ for addressing the “Negative” issue! We are a very positive group of people on this forum! There are times though when we need to show the negative side to MK so people will learn the truth about MK and other MLM’s! I don’t consider that being negative when you are telling the truth!
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In regular jobs, you brainstorm at meetings to overcome negative aspects. If there is a problem or if something is not working, it is beneficial for everyone to know what not to do or how to overcome the issue. IMO this shows the “dictatorship/cult like” qualities of MK. Life is not a bowl of cherries, and even if it was, you’d still have to deal with the ‘pits’.
LJ – I can’t get in the forum either!
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I joined MK back in 1987 and I left to raise my family, my choice. MK did not promise you success, but an opportunity. Mary Kays vision was to enhance womens lives. If you were in Mary Kay even for a short time, your life was change for the better. Thank God for those positive lessons, because when life gets rough, I am only happy to have those beliefs to fall back on. There are plenty of people out there who have no clue how to be positive. This is not instinctive. I know many of successful people in Mary Kay. It is only a shame that there is a website like this to try and destroy the possibility of success for others. Go get a real job……that is why you were attracted to the OPPORTUNITY anyway.
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Oh my Lisa, Lisa, Lisa…..you are sounding a bit negative to me with your last few comments….you started out so nicely stating your opinion and then that MK spirit reared and snarled it’s ugly head an made you say horrible things….truly a shame. You are welcome here to enjoy and love your MK business…..please don’t beat down on people that CHOOSE not to be involved with MK and have not had as wonderful an experience as you. Cheers!
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Lisa, we are positive people. A band of people who would never have known each other except for a chance meeting on this site.
The friendship is positive through and through!
It begins when you first tell your story and the ladies here tell you there is life after MK and you will be able to pay off your debts.
We talk about our children, our homes, our health, physical fitness, what’s for dinner, our jobs, our faith, we tell jokes, share what motivates us in different areas of our lives. We move on with our lives.
I guess you only know what you call the “negative” side of us because you insist that your way is better.
We are happy to let you have your MK and everything it brings you that makes you happy and we would even welcome you into our forum, just please stop trying to convert us back to MK…we love our lives post MK.
We lead productive, happy lives and lift each other up daily. We just don’t have to sell MK or attend fake Rah Rah meetings to “build’ us up.
We took back our positive lives when we left MK behind. We accept you as you are, why can’t you just accept us as we are?
Love to you, your family and your friends! Now show us some love and respect and talk about something else, please!
You just might get to know us and love us and realize that we are not miserable, negative people who have nothing in our lives to make us happy! I love life!
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Amen Lipstick
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Oh Lippie….where that Karma button when I need it? Well said my friend! (((HUGS)))!!!
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Oh Sassy…it’s true, it’s all from the heart! I never met a better bunch of ladies than on PLH, true friends…no fake rah, rah, just true caring!
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Lipstick for president!!!!!!
LJ, this is what we need as a cover piece for Pinklighthouse! It says it all about who and what we are! That gave me chills Lipstick!!!! Thank you for such a positive response!!!!!!!! HUGS!!!!!
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I admit I am a little negative sometimes…like after I just got off of work and had to deal with fussy customers all day.
Lisa your right. Even if someone was in Mary Kay for a short period of time (like I was in for only a year), it does change their lives for the better. It allows them to learn what a bunch of hypocritical and manipulative their consultants are! I’m not saying all women in MK are like that, but alot are.
This site isn’t negative. We don’t sit around talking about Mary Kay. Sure occasionally we do discuss something to do with MK but most of the time (99% of the time) we talk about important things…like family…and government…and health. We’re all supportive of eachother and we are all friends. We take time out of our hectic lives in order to give each other moral and emotional support that we might not receive otherwise. We don’t put MK down, but we do tell the truth about what we have seen with our own eyes. So if you wish to call us negative, please come to the inside and see how it really is or else your just proving us right. Like Lipstick said, you might end up loving us.
Oh and FYI: We all do have real jobs. I myself am a professional photographer as well as having a career in the music industry. What do you do again?
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Nobody is positive all the time. Life happens, but fortunately my attitiude never really did depend on MK.
Sure there are a lot of positive statements made and I repeated my share of them and posted them…but when you step outside the pink smoke and mirrors, you realize that EVERY ONE of them is designed to deceive people into believing MK is more than it is.
Why do you think they are quoting scripture and placing God into every decision you make? Do you honestly believe that God intends every woman to have a career that depends on duping other women and lying to their husbands, family and most of all to themselves?
Do you think God cares about makeup, money and prizes when there are starving people in the world? Do you think God approves of manipulating women into spending money on inventory they can’t sell?
I think God is shaking HIs head and maybe even shedding a tear at how SOME of those in MK run their business and use others all the while using
His name to make money and convinvce others that their lives cannot be enriched without MK!
IMO!
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Lipstick, as usual, I totally agree!
IMO – The manipulation is what is negative!
Once upon a time I was presented with the “opportunity” until I signed up, and then it was my “business” because I MUST carry inventory, which will “fly off the shelves” because women will flock to me, I can work this with all my daily responsibillities, but be able to stay at home with my child, (insert more script blah, blah) live happily ever after. Yeah, right!
Some say “negative” I say “truth”!
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Yes, I am negative about Mary Kay! I tried REALLY hard to make my business work and all I ended up doing was sitting in my dininigroom in tears after no one bothered to come to their “makeover” or my ”Holiday Open House” or whatever I had planned. I ended up with more inventory that was out dated or discontinued then I had of sellable inventory that I still couldn’t sell! Oh and my directors answer to this? “Oh just give it away, that’s what I do!” WTF? Yes, Mary Kay is a HUGE negative in my life, just ask the IRS!!!!!!!
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Hmm well hello.
I came across the site actually looking for tips on selling MK products. don’t get fuzzy ideas, I hate MK.
This whole thin goes directed to my mother, who’s been selling this things for around 7 years or something, honestly I lost count.
Itaks me out majorly that, whenever I go to any event with her, every single woman goes all “Omg you’re cony’s daughter you’re sure to be a consultant someday!” I just scowl. These women are all so fake and hypocritical, it sickens me.
It’s like being in high school, but with older people, all women, gah. They’re so plastic. Envy ain’t a new thing, and I know mom is very aware of it. Many of her consultant “friends” are fullfilled with jelousy, I truly can’t stand it.
Which is worse is that I know I’ll end up in the business someday if I don’t achieve and ace my expectations in life. (sound engineering, quite unlady-like according to mom)
Then, on the other hand, I can’ deny mom is having the time of her life. Even with all these envious women, she’s being super successfull, making a lot of money and is ust plain happy.
I wonder how can this all be, she’s fully aware of all the hypocritical brainwashing this company does but she’s still happy… who is wrong, she or people like, well pluralyzing, us?
I have the slight feeling this post will be super long, my apologies if it is ^^;
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Hi Mesha! Connie who? LOL Why do you sell it if you hate it so much? Just be honest and tell her that it sickens you to play all of these false games!!!!!! Best of luck to you!
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WhatwasIthinking, thanks.
Ah I don’t know, I’m not selling yet, and I truly hope I don’t end up doing it but.. what can I say, I want her to be happy and pleased about what I do, and if MK is a tool to help me achieve that.. I might end up being some brainwashed pink lady someday.
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Mesha,
Welcome! You should check out the forum and join us there – we talk about all kinds of things! As far as you starting in MK, if you’re not 110% “in” to it, willing to spend ALL your time thinking about sales, trying to get recruits, parties, etc., you won’t do very well. If you’re still in HS, perhaps you could delay by telling your Mom you need to devote your time to school, and hopefully, immediately afterwards, college. You could always carry one of her books for any “potential sales” on her behalf and not have to sign up yourself until you have decided whether or not its something you want.
You also hit the nail on the head and must be a very wise young lady, seeing through the fog to all the fakeness of MK! Click on the forum button and check out the rest of the site! We’d love to see you there!
Best wishes!
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I truly hope I don’t end up doing it but.. what can I say, I want her to be happy and pleased about what I do, and if MK is a tool to help me achieve that.. I might end up being some brainwashed pink lady someday.
Mesha, I’m not slamming you Mom, but I am sure she loves you very much and wants you to be happy. Just be honest with her and say “Mom, I love you very much and I’m so happy that you enjoy your MK career, but it’s just not what I want to do.”
Your future happiness depends on making the right career choices for you. You will spend 40 or more years working, make sure you are doing something you enjoy or it can seem like a prison sentence.
Go to the top of the page and click on the Forum button and join us. We would like to hear more from you. You can at least read and get the truth and assess MK with eyes wide open.
Best of luck to you and much happiness in your chosen career!
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Mesha, your mom should be happy with what makes you happy! It’s great that she is doing well, but if it’s not for you, it’s not for you!
So tell us, is it Connie Kittson?
Visit us on the forums, the link is at the top of this page! Hope to see you there Mesha!
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What the heck, they can go ahead and call me negative. Sometimes…particularly in MK…the truth is ugly.
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I like your post on this topic. And you are right on target with asking not only these consultants, but every one of us, to examine clearly what it is we are supporting when we become involved.
It also wouldn’t hurt to become aware enough to investigate who’s agenda they are actually ‘selling’ with these products and whether they can still feel good about selling them at the end of the day. We need to begin to wake up as a society and realign ourselves with what really matters now.
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Some people, within all organizations, will be negative. My director would never call me a smother-mother for taking a break from my business to stay home with my daughter after just giving birth! Anyone who would isn’t a nice person–it’s not about MK as a company.
I love my business and it’s been very rewarding. When I put forth the effort, I succeed. Period. When I question myself and say, “Oh, I don’t know, if I call her she might say no,” then I stand no chance of success. I have to DO something to expect any return. I put in as much effort as I want, really, knowing that I’m not going to expect to be a director right away based on my personal production. I’m comfortable where I am–for now. I enjoy being in control of my business and having something of my own. I make a profit. I love it.
I’m sorry that some people have bad experiences, but if you work for it and if you surround yourself with good people you can have positive experiences. To the directors and team leaders who have been intolerant and negative towards their consultants: Shame on you.
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Laura, if you have a director like you describe you are in the minority. Believe me the majority are of the me first, make a buck, get that first big inventory order from each recruit, recruit, recruit, recruit!
When I put forth the effort, I succeed. Period. When I question myself and say, “Oh, I don’t know, if I call her she might say no,” then I stand no chance of success. I have to DO something to expect any return.
I’ll bet you are still brand new and haven’t yet realized how much that script is used and abused in the MK world. Eventually you will find yourself working your tail off for very little return and missing out on a lot of family activities. You will most certainly realize that most people do not want to be hassled by phone calls every month or even every quarter.
I’m sorry that some people have bad experiences, but if you work for it and if you surround yourself with good people you can have positive experiences.
Most of us worked our tails off to try to make a go of this business, you’ve been drinking the pink koolaid and listening to the drivel about those who didn’t succeed, just did not put for the effort. Why do you think there are so many sites like this one and so many more people with bad experiences than good? Could it be that YOU are wrong and not us?
I sincerely hope you will take time to enter the forum and read a bit. You will find a lot of helpful information to keep you from making major mistakes and losing a lot of money and getting into deep debt. Don’t make the mistake of discounting the advice of those who have gone before you and only listening to the MK talk. And if you decide to ignore the advice I’ve given you and find yourself where we were, just pop in you’ll find a lot of love and support and nobody will say “I told you so”!
You’ll find we talk abut a lot more than MK…when we worked our business, we gave too much of our family time and personal time away!
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